TEASER
(Open: Airplane exterior; night. Interior of airplane. Camera pans through first class; BRENNAN’s chair is reclined, and she is sleeping with a smile and wearing an eye mask. Pan through coach shows BOOTH sitting in the middle of the plane between two elderly women, one sleeping with her head on his shoulder. BOOTH looks at the sleeping woman, then to his right; the other woman is reading.)
BOOTH: Excuse me—
CHARLOTTE: (interrupts) Just a minute.
BOOTH: (sighs) Ma’am, this woman is asleep next to me and I really have to get out.
CHARLOTTE: (laughs and closes book) It’s just that this book is so exciting. Do you like mysteries?
BOOTH: Well, I-I’m an FBI agent, so mysteries are sort of my thing.
CHARLOTTE: (whispers) I’m an aficionado myself. I’m here with NADINE. (points to sleeping woman) She’s plotting the perfect murder. For years now. But just for fun.
BOOTH: Right, you can tell me all about it later; I’ve really got to get out. I gotta go.
CHARLOTTE: Oh, right. When you gotta go, you gotta go.
BOOTH: Yeah. (eases NADINE’s head off of his shoulder and stands, then stands and shuffles toward CHARLOTTE.) Sorry. (steps over her legs quickly and walks toward first class)
(Cut to first class; a boy is stealing small bottles of liquor from a serving cart. BOOTH walks through curtain separating classes and, seeing the boy, walks up to his seat.)
BOOTH: Hey. How old are you? (shows boy his badge)
ELI: (sighs) Come on, we’re at thirty-six thousand feet, that’s outside the three-mile limit.
BOOTH: This is American soil until we touch down in Shanghai, alright? So come on, hand them over.
(ELI gives the bottles to BOOTH. ELI’s father turns in his seat and looks back at them.)
ARTHUR BILBREY: ELI, what are you doing now? You know your mother isn’t feeling well. (to BOOTH) Is he bothering you?
(BOOTH and ELI exchange looks.)
BOOTH: No. We were just talking. That’s all.
ELI: Yeah, you can sleep, Dad. It’s all good.
(BILBREY grunts and sits back in his seat. BOOTH walks backward while pointing two fingers towards his eyes and one finger toward ELI. ELI raises his hands in mock surrender. BOOTH walks to empty seat next to BRENNAN, looks around, and sits down. He opens a plastic bag of complimentary items and removes a slipper. He looks at BRENNAN, smiles, and puts the slipper over his hand before reaching across BRENNAN’s reclined seat and moving his fingers like a puppet in her face and making a barking noise.)
BRENNAN: Huh? What? Booth…(removes eye mask)
BOOTH: Wow, look at this. I don’t even get a hot meal, and you get pajamas and slippers? (waves hand with slipper on it)
BRENNAN: The basic amenities. The flight is over thirteen hours.
BOOTH: Yeah, I know, I spent the last eight of them back there in Gitmo. (makes excited noise as he reclines his seat) Yes!
BRENNAN: You know you aren’t allowed up here. (takes slipper from BOOTH)
BOOTH: What? We’re, uh, we’re a team, okay? This is government business. You shouldn’t have paid for your own ticket, you know. (BOOTH’S seat starts vibrating) Ooh, a massager! (BOOTH makes buzzing noises.)
FLIGHT ATTENDANT KATE MCNUTT: (walks up to BOOTH) Sir, you need to return to coach. (Booth opens his eyes and looks at MCNUTT, who nods.)
BOOTH: (buzzes) See, we’re partners, we like being together.
MCNUTT: Your sexual relationship’s not relevant, sir. This is first class.
BRENNAN: Why does everyone else think we have a sexual relationship when we barely even touch each other?
BOOTH: Oh, I got it. (stands) All right, here we go. (brandishes badge) FBI Special Agent Seeley BOOTH, this here’s my partner, Dr. Temperance BRENNAN, and, uh, she is actually going to China—well, we’re going to China, and she’s going to help the Chinese government help identify some real old Chinese dude.
BRENNAN: (is sitting up fully) Bones were found in a wuhan cave, over forty thousand years old.
BOOTH: According to title eighteen, section eighteen thirty-one, I must protect the proprietary American technology Dr. BRENNAN will be using. So, it is my patriotic duty to be right next to her, (sits down) here, like a bodyguard. (reclines)
BRENNAN: This trip is taking me back to my real passion. (reclines) Prehistoric anthropological discoveries.
MCNUTT: Fascinating. Sir.
(BOOTH looks at BRENNAN, confused.)
MCNUTT: You have to go back to your seat.
BRENNAN: Sorry. (pulls down eye mask)
(BOOTH turns off the vibrator and sits up.)
MCNUTT: Right now.
BOOTH: Right. (stands up and walks back toward coach, then quickly leans over seats and pokes BRENNAN) Bones. Bones!
(BRENNAN removes eye mask)
BOOTH: What do you mean, your “real passion”? I thought us working together was your real passion.
MCNUTT: You two can take up this fight again after we land.
BOOTH: (sighs) All right. (takes complimentary bag)
MCNUTT: Watch your head.
BOOTH: (hits head) Ow…
MCNUTT: (weak laugh)
BRENNAN: You okay?
BOOTH: Yeah, I’m fine. (rubs back of head and walks backward toward curtain, MCNUTT following.)
(Camera pans to ELI stealing another bottle and drinking from it.)
BOOTH: (in background) Kicking me back to the cattle class. You know, that’s not right.
MCNUTT: Enjoy your flight, sir. (curtain closes)
(Cut to: The Jeffersonian’s Medico Legal Lab—just outside HODGINS’ area. SWEETS, HODGINS and ANGELA are walking toward the building’s entrance, coats and bags in hand.)
SWEETS: So, the cat’s away and it’s TGIF, huh?
(Camera sweeps to CAM, who converges with the group)
CAM: I’m right here. I’m the cat.
SWEETS: (puts on his coat) Well, in this case I think that Dr. BRENNAN is the cat.
CAM: I’m the cat, who’s giving the mice the rest of the day off.
SWEETS: Hey, so, Daisy and I were wondering if anyone would like to join us for a little competitive karaoke this evening. Huh? Some pre-weekend fun, huh? (slaps HODGINS on the shoulder) I’m singing “Lime in the Coconut.”
HODGINS: Sorry, I’m going to be biking the Virginia Creeper Trail.
ANGELA: Roxie and I are going to an artists’ retreat in Pond View.
CAM: And I’m driving ANGELA to the train station.
ANGELA: You are?
CAM: Yes, I am.
ANGELA: Oh.
(Roxie walks up to group and puts a hand on ANGELA’s shoulder.)
ROXIE: Ready to go, Angie?
ANGELA: Hey, yeah, I’m all set.
ROXIE: I haven’t been to one of these retreats since we were in school.
ANGELA: Well, I’ll see you all on Monday.
CAM: Have a good weekend! (walks away with ANGELA and ROXIE)
(SWEETS waves and starts to walk away. HODGINS lightly slaps the back of his hand against SWEETS’ chest and stops him.)
HODGINS: What do you think?
SWEETS: What do you think?
HODGINS: Oh, don’t, don’t do that, the whole “answer a question with a question” thing.
SWEETS: Why does whatever’s going on between ROXIE and ANGELA matter to you?
HODGINS: Because ANGELA and I were engaged. And now she’s with a woman. It matters because…(SWEETS nods) what? It just matters.
SWEETS: Well, don’t you feel that both of you are entitled to your own private lives?
HODGINS: Stop asking me questions.
SWEETS: Do you feel threatened?
HODGINS: Okay, that’s it, I’m out of here. (walks away)
SWEETS: I…You know, a little karaoke might help you unwind. Especially when I’m singing. I’ve got a beautiful tenor.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach.)
BOOTH: (turns to CHARLOTTE) Excuse me. (stands and exits row)
CHARLOTTE: You should get your prostate checked.
(BOOTH peeks through curtain. MCNUTT is at the flight attendant station.)
MCNUTT: Uh, this damn thing. (walks downstairs)
(BOOTH walks through curtain and toward BRENNAN. He takes a bottle from ELI as he passes, then sits down next to BRENNAN.)
BOOTH: (whispering) Bones. Bones.
BRENNAN: (takes off eye mask and headphones) Huh. You’re going to get in trouble.
BOOTH: She’s downstairs. You didn’t answer me before. You tired of working with me?
BRENNAN: (sitting up) No, it’s not that. But the identification and analysis of ancient remains, that’s why I became a forensic anthropologist.
BOOTH: You’re bored. Hm. Spark is gone.
BRENNAN: I’m a scientist first.
BOOTH: Right. (small laugh) Yeah. Scientist first. I, I get it. I understand. (makes a “whew” noise and starts putting on an eye mask)
BRENNAN: Hey. If you get caught up here, does that make me an accessory?
BOOTH: An accessory to an upgrade. (pulls eye mask down over eyes and whistles as he reclines and seat vibrates) Oh ho, yeah! That is heaven.
(BRENNAN smiles, reclines and pulls down her eye mask. A scream is heard, and BOOTH and BRENNAN sit up quickly and remove their eye masks before standing.)
BOOTH: Bones. Down there.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN run down the stairs into the kitchen galley.)
BOOTH: Oh my God.
(MCNUTT is standing next to a large microwave oven and pointing into it at a victim’s body.)
BOOTH: That’s a, uh, it’s a body, right?
(Opening credits)
(Cut to: Airplane exterior; airplane interior, attendant station)
BOOTH: Can you account for all your people, Captain Blake?
BLAKE: Me and the co-pilot, yeah. Cabin crew, you’d have to Miss MCNUTT.
BRENNAN: Well, she isn’t speaking.
BOOTH: Bones, not everyone brushes off these horrible experiences, okay? Let me try this, okay? (walks over to MCNUTT, who is sitting and staring ahead blankly)
BOOTH: What’s your name? (MCNUTT doesn’t reply. BOOTH looks at BRENNAN, then BLAKE, before leaning down.) What’s your first name?
MCNUTT: Kathryn. KATE.
BOOTH: KATE! ‘Kay, KATE. What you saw down there, you don’t ever have to see again. Are you missing any people?
MCNUTT: (holds BOOTH’s tie and pets it, then shakes her head) I can still smell—
BRENNAN: (interrupting) It’s very much like roast pork.
BOOTH: Bones…(hands MCNUTT a bottle of water) Just want you to relax, have a little water. We might need your help.
BLAKE: Need her help? For what? We fly to China and call the cops.
BOOTH: No, no, no, you’re going to have to turn this puppy around. We’re going to head back home.
BLAKE: No can do. We passed the point of no return fuel-wise twenty-three minutes ago.
BRENNAN: The polar route takes us over Greenland. Can we land there to refuel?
BLAKE: Not with the weather they’re having. I’m sorry, but our next stop is Shanghai, China. Don’t worry, they have cops there. Lots of them.
BOOTH: Well, until these wheels touch down, this plane is sovereign US territory.
BLAKE: Look, FBI guy, you do whatever you want, as long as it doesn’t this flight. But in four hours, we’re on sovereign Chinese territory. (walks away)
BRENNAN: (walks over to MCNUTT) Excuse me. Before you become completely catatonic, can you tell me how to access the internet? I—I need to contact my people.
BOOTH: Bones, you don’t have to shout. She’s in shock, not deaf.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab entrance. HODGINS is walking quickly inside, carrying a bike helmet, wearing a backpack and removing ear buds.)
HODGINS: (to CAM, who is waiting near entrance) What? What, are you kidding? Because the message I got, that could not be correct.
CAM: I’d rather brief everyone at once.
(SWEETS walks in, wearing a white polo and plaid shorts.)
SWEETS: What’s going on?
HODGINS: Wow, is that what you really look like?
SWEETS: Cam said an emergency, I didn’t have time to—(to CAM) I think maybe your message was garbled?
CAM: I’d rather brief everyone at once.
(ANGELA and ROXIE walk in, ANGELA pulling one suitcase.)
ANGELA: There was a murder on BRENNAN’s plane to China?
CAM: Good, we’re all here.
ANGELA: (to SWEETS) What are you, like, sixteen?
SWEETS: (looks down) Aw, I love these shorts.
CAM: A body was found roasted beyond recognition in a large convection microwave oven on BOOTH and BRENNAN’s flight to China.
ANGELA: (turns to ROXIE) Maybe you should…
ROXIE: Yeah, I’m gonna…
ANGELA: Thanks.
ROXIE: (takes suitcase) Call me when you get to the bad guy. (ROXIE walks away. HODGINS watches her exit the building.)
SWEETS: And I’m here because?
CAM: You were on my speed dial.
SWEETS: Okay…(walks away)
ANGELA: Okay. (walks away in a different direction)
HODGINS: Uh, Dr. Saroyan? Um…two people, they, uh, they go away together and they pack one bag, that, that means something, right?
CAM: (struggles for words) You mean, ANGELA and ROXIE…Well…Yeah, it means something. (walks away quickly)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach. BOOTH is walking toward CHARLOTTE. He stops at her seat.)
BOOTH: Excuse me.
CHARLOTTE: What’s going on?
BOOTH: (whispering) Listen. Would you happen to have a measuring tape and tweezers?
CHARLOTTE: (gasp) There’s been a murder. NADINE, NADINE. They need tweezers for an autopsy. Code red, code red.
BOOTH: (over the top of her) Shh! No! No! Shh! No code red. Don’t wake NADINE up. I will explain everything to you later, I promise, Charlotte. I just need those things, do you have them?
CHARLOTTE: (rummages through her bag) Well I didn’t hear a gunshot. So it must have been a knifing. I saw Dr. Temperance Brennan, the mystery writer, in first class. I bet she’s doing the autopsy. (whispers) Listen, I was awake the whole time, and anyone who went that way (points toward first class), they came back again. So if the victim is a passenger, he or she is in first class. Probably she, because most murder victims are women.
BOOTH: Wow, you really are into murder, aren’t you. (CHARLOTTE produces items and hands them to BOOTH.) Thanks.
CHARLOTTE: Wait! (pulls knitting needle from her bag) Dr. BRENNAN will need this.
BOOTH: What’s that for?
CHARLOTTE: It’s a probe! (hands it to BOOTH) This is the best flight I’ve ever been on.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen. BRENNAN is taking pictures of the oven.)
ANGELA: (via BRENNAN’s laptop) Okay, sweetie, we have a solid link here, audio and visual, so you should be able to beam us all the digital photographs you can.
BRENNAN: Okay, we’ve isolated the crime scene, and we’ll try to compromise the forensics as little as possible.
BOOTH: (walks into kitchen and holds knitting needle out to BRENNAN) Look what I got.
BRENNAN: Oh, a probe! That’s great, I didn’t think of that.
BOOTH: Yeah, lucky I did.
ANGELA: (through laptop) Hey, Booth. Good flight so far?
BOOTH: Yeah, I’m having trouble sleeping.
(Cam walks into picture on BRENNAN’s laptop.)
CAM: (through laptop) Looks like you managed to get the remains out of the oven.
BOOTH: Yeah, they’re, uh, they’re kind of, uh, well, they, they’ve fallen apart, a little bit there. Hey Bones. (walks over to other side of kitchen and points his pen at the phone, dangling from the cradle by its cord) Did you knock the phone off this cradle?
BRENNAN: No.
(BOOTH uses a piece of cloth to pick up the phone and visually inspect it.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. BLAKE, BOOTH, MCNUTT and flight attendant MING MING are talking.)
BLAKE: I’ve informed the FAA, the NTSB and the Chinese that we have a dead body on board.
BOOTH: Hey, who else has access to the galley down there?
MCNUTT: All of us.
MING: It’s kind of our getaway place. To chill out from passengers.
BOOTH: Who was the last person who made a call from the satellite phone down there?
BLAKE: I can get you the number called.
MING: It was me.
BOOTH: You? What are you, a spy or a smuggler?
MCNUTT: No, (stands) she’s in love, Agent BOOTH, and her boyfriend works for this airline at the Shanghai airport.
BLAKE: It’s against the rules.
MING: So’s having sex with passengers in the bathroom.
BLAKE: (looks around awkwardly) Okay, I think we’re all under a lot of stress here.
MING: I used the phone right after dinner. There was no dead body cooking in the microwave.
BOOTH: Tell you what. Why don’t you two go do a seat count, tell me what passengers are missing, okay?
(Everyone walks away, BOOTH and BLAKE exchanging awkward glances before they do so.)
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, Forensics Platform. CAM, ANGELA and HODGINS are working on the case in front of TV screens displaying BRENNAN’s photographs.)
CAM: A macro photo of the victim’s follicle suggests brown hair, maybe red.
BRENNAN: (through TV) I estimate her height to be a hundred and fifty-seven centimeters.
ANGELA: Ooh. HODGINS has that meerkat look on his face.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley.)
HODGINS: (through laptop) What’s going on with her fingernails?
BRENNAN: (examines a hand) Are you referring to the spots around the phalanges?
CAM: (through laptop) What would cause those kinds of burns?
HODGINS: (through laptop) False fingernails. ABS plastic and ethyl cyanoacrylate glue. Like torches.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, Forensics Platform.)
CAM: So, a petite brown- or red-haired woman with fake nails.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley; BRENNAN nods. Camera sweeps length of remains.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. BOOTH, MCNUTT and MING are standing by the curtain to first class.)
BOOTH: Five foot two, three, small, brown, uh, red hair. Fake nails.
MCNUTT: Fake nails…seat three B, ELIZABETH JONES.
BOOTH: Seat three B.
(BOOTH and MCNUTT walk through curtain into first class and stop at seat three B. MCNUTT closes the curtain.)
BOOTH: (to the seat’s neighboring occupant) Hey buddy. (shakes him) Buddy, buddy. Wake up. Excuse me, I’m sorry to bother you but do you remember the person who was sitting right here next to you?
MAN: No, (sigh) I took a sleeping pill. Are we in China?
(MCNUTT shakes her head.)
BOOTH: Wait a sec, you spend seven grand on a flight and you sleep through the whole thing? You don’t even eat first?
BILBREY: (stands from seat and walks toward BOOTH) Excuse me, Agent BOOTH?
BOOTH: Yeah.
BILBREY: I’m ARTHUR BILBREY, my wife ANN is very ill. I’d appreciate it if she could get some rest before we landed?
ANN: I’ll be fine. Relax.
(ELI stands from his seat behind BOOTH.)
ELI: You’d better be really quiet, or, (sways drunkenly) I’ll take you down, FBI! (laughs)
BILBREY: ELI. Please. (to BOOTH) This is my son.
ELI: (drops back into his seat, laughing.) I got your back, Mom.
(ANN smiles at ELI. BOOTH glances between the two.)
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, Forensics Platform. CAM is working in front of the TV screens, and CAROLINE is approaching as she talks on her cellular phone.)
CAROLINE: You got a name?
BOOTH: (in background, from phone) Yeah, ELIZABETH Jones, seat three B, first class. The sooner you can get us a background…(BOOTH’s voice echoes as CAROLINE approaches the screens, where BOOTH’s voice is also being projected from. BOOTH sees her and takes his phone away from his ear)…check, uh, the better for us. (BOOTH hangs up.)
CAROLINE: (hangs up) Well, now, that’s just strange. (waves at screen) Um, let me, uh…(lifts phone back to her ear)…let me make a call and get back to you. (walks away)
CAM: ANGELA and HODGINS noticed a shadow in the exposed part of the sternum.
(cut to: Airplane Interior, kitchen galley)
BRENNAN: Yes, I saw that. I…(shakes head)…there is something here, but I--I, I can’t identify it.
CAM: (through laptop) ANGELA suggested that you take as many photos as possible at your highest resolution.
BRENNAN: All right. (takes off gloves, picks up camera and takes two pictures. Close-up of one picture is shown.)
(cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, Forensics Platform.)
BRENNAN: (through TV) It’s not bone, (BOOTH sighs) it’s inorganic.
(CAROLINE walks up from behind CAM.)
CAROLINE: This quick enough for you? Your victim is ELIZABETH Joy Jones, she’s a travel writer for DC Voyager Magazine.
BOOTH: (through TV) Well, you got to get over to that magazine.
CAROLINE: (hangs up phone) Why?
BOOTH: (through TV) Why—they might know why she got murdered.
CAROLINE: You got this backwards, cherie. I am not an investigator.
BRENNAN: (through TV) Neither am I, and here I am, taking apart another murder victim.
BOOTH: (through TV) Look, just go talk to the boss, the secretary, pretend they’re on the stand. Take SWEETS with you.
CAROLINE: If you want me to do this, you have to make a good case.
BRENNAN: (through TV) Want you to do what?
CAROLINE: If you want me to take on the Chinese government, the State Department, the FAA, and the NTSB, and for all I know, the UN, you make me a damn, fine, solid case.
(cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley. BOOTH and BRENNAN exchange glances.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley. Close-up on victim’s skull as camera pulls back; BRENNAN begins to peel layers of dermis off of the skull, and BOOTH is standing a few feet away with his back turned.)
BOOTH: Ugh. Bones, can you (whirls a finger in the air) turn her around so she’s not looking at us?
BRENNAN: (is placing bits into a stainless steel bowl) She’s deceased, BOOTH, she can’t see.
BOOTH: Oh, man.
(BRENNAN pours hot water into the bowl. BOOTH peeks into the bowl, where an eyeball floats up.)
BOOTH: (looking away from the bowl quickly) I am definitely not a squint. Woah.
BRENNAN: Well, I’ve always known that. You have no training in the field of forensic science.
BOOTH: Really don’t want any. (shakes head)
BRENNAN: Okay, to make an arrest, we need time and cause of death, as well as something (pulls a piece of dermis out of the bowl with tweezers) that can ID the killer.
BOOTH: What do you need?
BRENNAN: Magnifying lens.
BOOTH: Okay. (begins to walk away) Right.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach. BOOTH is walking down the aisle towards CHARLOTTE and stops at her seat.)
BOOTH: (to another passenger who’s seat he bumps) Sorry. (to CHARLOTTE) Look, I, uh, I need a magnifying glass. I thought you might have one for, you know, the fine print.
CHARLOTTE: My eyes are perfect. (whispers) Is the magnifying glass for examining the victim’s corpse?
(Camera sweeps to NADINE, who is still sleeping and is wearing reading glasses around her neck.)
BOOTH: You don’t think that, uh, NADINE would mind if I, uh…(steps into row and takes glasses off their chain)
CHARLOTTE: She’d be thrilled if she were awake. She sleeps like a log.
(BOOTH grunts, holds glasses up and returns to the aisle)
CHARLOTTE: Now, what equipment would Dr. Brennan normally use in this situation?
BOOTH: I don’t know. I’m more of a people person. (walks away)
CHARLOTTE: Oh. (watches him walk away)
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, ANGELA’s office. Computer screen shows pictures of victim’s remains, and camera sweeps from screen to ANGELA, who is standing in front of it and typing.)
ANGELA: I’m using interpolation software with a blending edge algorithm. (HODGINS is standing beside her.) Kind of like what I’d do if I were restoring a painting.
HODGINS: So, did ROXIE go to the retreat without you?
ANGELA: Uh, no, we’re gonna do something here.
HODGINS: Right. (nods)
ANGELA: (looks at HODGINS and laughs) Don’t say it like that.
HODGINS: Like what? (ANGELA looks away) I know. Sorry.
ANGELA: What do you think? Candle wax?
HODGINS: Well, judging by the burn characteristics, some kind of thermoplastic, but what (leans closer to screen) is that? (Screen, zooms in on picture) Like something reflective.
ANGELA: Yeah. (types) I’ll get the computer to find the all the pixels that are within a couple shades on the color wheel.
HODGINS: Cool, and just, zap it to my computer?
ANGELA: Yeah.
(HODGINS straightens and walks away. ANGELA watches him, then turns back to the computer screen with a sigh.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley. BRENNAN is wearing the reading glasses as she works.)
BOOTH: (walks in) Bones—(sees glasses and smiles) All right, what I want you to do is take off your glasses, (steps closer) shake out your hair and say, “Mr. Booth, do you know what the penalty is for an overdue book?”
BRENNAN: Why?
BOOTH: Never mind. (steps back)
BRENNAN: This notch mark, here on the occipital, is what knocked her unconscious. The hairline fractures weakened the integrity of the cranium and caused it to burst when heated.
BOOTH: So she was hit. With what?
BRENNAN: Well, I’ll have to take an impression to find out.
BOOTH: How?
BRENNAN: W—I need denture cream. (BOOTH starts walking away) And, uh, baby powder.
BOOTH: Baby powder.
BRENNAN: And a-a butane lighter, please?
BOOTH: Is that it?
BRENNAN: Uh, I think so. Yes.
(BRENNAN watches BOOTH walk away, then takes off her gloves and glasses and shakes out her hair. Looking confused, she puts back on the glasses and ties her hair back.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach class. BOOTH is standing by CHARLOTTE’s seat.)
CHARLOTTE: Sorry, dear, but these are my real choppers. And NADINE’s are real, too. Is Dr. Brennan making a cast of an injury? That’s what she’d do in her books.
BOOTH: (to MING) Hit the lights.
(MING turns on lights and picks up phone.)
MING: (over speakers) Ladies and gentlemen, sorry to disturb you, but Agent BOOTH of the FBI would like to address you. (BOOTH takes phone)
BOOTH: Attention, everyone, I need to requisition some denture cream, baby powder, and a butane lighter.
MING: (to BOOTH) Lighters are strictly forbidden on the aircraft.
BOOTH: (to MING, covering phone and whispering) So’s murder. (over speakers) Denture cream?
OLD MAN: Here, sonny. (BOOTH walks over and takes denture cream.) There you go.
BOOTH: Okay, how about some, uh, baby powder, face powder? Anybody have any baby powder, face powder? (Woman raises hand.) There, great. Okay, how ‘bout a lighter? Butane lighter. (The plane is silent.) Come on, no one has a lighter? (MING covertly hands BOOTH a lighter.) (whispering) Woah.
MING: I confiscated it.
BOOTH: (whispering) Obviously.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley. BRENNAN is mixing a paste.)
BRENNAN: This is good. The powder contains hydrated silica and calcium carbonate. (applies paste to skull)
BOOTH: (sitting at the foot of the stairs) Come on, isn’t this a lot more fun than the wuhan cave and the forty-thousand-year-old skeletons?
(BRENNAN looks at BOOTH, and BOOTH shrugs and makes a vague hand gesture. BRENNAN turns back to her work.)
BOOTH: Is this gonna work?
BRENNAN: (uses lighter to heat paste) Should. This should—
BOOTH: (standing) Bones, you’re—you’re just, you’re filling me up with confidence right now. (sighs and walks over to BRENNAN) Whoa.
BRENNAN: (turns off lighter) There. Now, all we need to do…(peels up the cast)…is find the item that matches this, and we have our weapon.
BOOTH: Right. That’s all, huh? (sighs)
BRENNAN: Well, at least we know it’s on the airplane.
(BRENNAN’s laptop beeps, and CAM appears on the screen.)
CAM: (through laptop) Any luck with cause of death?
BOOTH: Yeah, someone knocked her on the head and it exploded on the cranium thing.
CAM: (through laptop) We’re looking at the margins of the burned flesh around the rectus abdominis…
BRENNAN: I dislike the occlusive nature of tissue.
CAM: (through laptop) Look, just think of it as bone wrapping. From the photos, it looks as if there’s a pinkish coloration. Is that correct?
BRENNAN: “Pinkish” is a subjective term, and I’m not comfortable applying, uh, subjective evaluation to evidence that’s not even—
BOOTH: (interrupts) It’s pinkish, and gross-ish.
CAM: (through laptop) Okay, that indicates presence of blood flow at the time she was cooked.
BOOTH: (looking between BRENNAN and CAM) She was still alive in the microwave? How long was she in there?
CAM: (through laptop) Since the oven temp was set at maximum and she was approximately one hundred and ten pounds…uh, can you describe the breast tissue?
BRENNAN: I’m not sure how to qualify what I see in descriptive terms.
BOOTH: Well, if she was a turkey, she’d be dry and overdone.
CAM: (through laptop) Okay, that means she had to be cooking for about six and a half hours.
BRENNAN: Giving us time of death. Huh.
(BOOTH starts walking slowly around the galley.)
CAM: (through laptop) If I were you, I’d get some tissue samples.
BRENNAN: Sometimes flesh can be quite informative. (cuts a piece of flesh from the body and puts it in a glass)
(BOOTH holds the cast up against a latch of an appliance.)
BOOTH: Ha! Bones? Think we got a match.
(BRENNAN walks over to BOOTH and looks at the cast and the latch.)
BRENNAN: Someone slammed her head against the latch.
BOOTH: And shoved her in the oven and cooked her. (makes a noise) Wait a second. (nudges over a cart, which reveals a band-aid on the floor. BRENNAN takes off her gloves, picks up the camera and takes a picture.
(Cut to: FBI Conference Room. SWEETS, CAROLINE and HOWARD KENDALL are sitting down at the conference table.)
KENDALL: Are you sure it was ELIZABETH?
CAROLINE: Of course, they’ll have to do a DNA- or dental-match when they land, but they’re pretty sure, yes.
KENDALL: Man, I can’t believe she’s gone. Liz was one of the best, uh, travel writers in the country.
CAROLINE: How would you characterize her relationships with others?
KENDALL: Uh, warm, friendly, outgoing. N-not an enemy in the world.
CAROLINE: (looks at SWEETS) Jump in anytime, Dr. SWEETS.
SWEETS: No, no, I’m cool.
CAROLINE: Oh. As long as you’re cool…(turns back to KENDALL) Was Miss Jones on assignment?
KENDALL: No, no. This was a, uh, a pleasure trip. She had just finished a piece for us on airline safety.
CAROLINE: Ironic.
KENDALL: It was an expose on pilots that have hid drunk driving convictions from their employers.
(CAROLINE glances meaningfully at SWEETS, who is looking at KENDALL.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. BRENNAN is pulling small bottles of liquor from a cart, and BOOTH is standing next to her.)
BOOTH: Bones, what is that?
BRENNAN: Oh, tissue samples.
BOOTH: Oh no, don’t…(quickly closes curtain) Don’t let people see that.
BRENNAN: (circles around cart) Well I need vodka.
BOOTH: Yeah, well I do too, Bones, but you know what? We’re working.
BRENNAN: No, to preserve the tissue samples. All they’ve got left is bourbon and scotch.
BOOTH: Hold on. (walks through curtain and into first class)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class. BOOTH walks to ELI’s seat, where ELI is still drunk.)
BOOTH: Come on.
ELI: What?
BOOTH: Okay. Hand it over. Hand the vodka over. Come on.
(ELI sighs, pulls two bottles out of his pocket and gives them to BOOTH.)
BOOTH: Thought so. Look, (looks at ANN) obviously your mom is sick, and you love her. And that’s probably why you’re acting badly. But what you gotta do, is you gotta think, really think, how to help her.
ELI: She’s gonna die, okay? What am I supposed to do about that?
BOOTH: (stands as satellite phone beeps) Make her proud of you. (walks away and answers phone) Yeah. (looks back at ELI).
CAROLINE: (through phone) I just got a copy of ELIZABETH JONES’ next article.
(Cut to: FBI, outside of the conference room. CAROLINE is holding a stack of papers.)
CAROLINE: It’s about pilots with DUI convictions.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class. BOOTH is walking through the curtains and into the attendant station.)
BOOTH: All right, is there a link to anything on this flight?
CAROLINE: (through phone) I have a search team looking for her research, but I do know the airline you’re on is singled out as the worst offender. (BOOTH gives vodka to BRENNAN)
(Cut to: FBI, outside of the conference room.)
CAROLINE: And the pilot on your plane there? He’s got a past.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. BOOTH is looking at the pilot’s and co-pilot’s name plaques outside the cabin’s doors.)
BOOTH: Thanks, CAROLINE.
(Cut to: Airplane exterior. Airplane interior, cabin.)
BLAKE: (sitting in pilot’s seat) You do realize that by sending my co-pilot out, you broke about forty laws, legal-wise.
BOOTH: Yeah, well I thought we might have a, uh—(sits down in co-pilot’s seat, and chair sinks down)—woah! A private man-to-man conversation about, uh, ELIZABETH Jones.
BLAKE: Her name does not ring a bell.
BOOTH: So, is this how you slow this plane down? (reaches forward for a lever)
BLAKE: Please, don’t touch that. Don’t touch anything.
BOOTH: ELIZABETH JONES was a journalist.
BLAKE: I do not know her.
BOOTH: Well, she knows you. She wrote an article about alcohol and, uh, pilots.
BLAKE: And what’s that got to do with me?
BOOTH: 2002, DUI, never reported that to the FAA. You know, that is a two hundred fifty thousand dollar fine and, uh, five years in jail.
BLAKE: That DUI charge, it was the day of my dad’s funeral. I know it’s not stylish, but I happen to love my old man.
BOOTH: Well, it’s still a motive. Legal-wise.
BLAKE: I did not kill her. I didn’t even know she existed.
BOOTH: I need you to slow this plane down.
BLAKE: Why?
BOOTH: Well, to give us time to find out who did, unless it was you, and in that case, time, that doesn’t matter.
BLAKE: (shakes his head , looking aggravated) I can report electrical issues, maybe give you an extra hour.
BOOTH: Great. I’ll take that as a sign of cooperation, captain. (stands) Oh, it’s a beautiful view. Look at that. (claps BLAKE’s shoulder)
(Cut to: FBI conference room. KENDALL and SWEETS are sitting around the table.)
KENDALL: How long do I have to stay here?
SWEETS: (standing and removing his jacket) I was interested in some of the things you were saying earlier.
KENDALL: Hey, I answered every question the scary woman asked me.
SWEETS: (sits down in a closer chair) Yeah. Well, the thing is, she’s a lawyer, so she’s very direct.
KENDALL: Scary.
SWEETS: She has a knack for putting people into federal prison. I believe she likes to do it. I have a more psychological mojo.
KENDALL: You don’t look like you have a mojo.
SWEETS: I’m interested in what you know about ELIZABETH JONES’ personal life.
KENDALL: (weak laugh) I did not have sex with that woman.
SWEETS: But you wanted to.
KENDALL: Yeah, but I didn’t.
SWEETS: Was she the type to have affairs?
KENDALL: Yes.
SWEETS: Have you got a name? (KENDALL looks at SWEETS) I can go get Miss JULIAN again if you’re more comfortable with her.
KENDALL: Artie. All I know is Artie.
SWEETS: Artie. Okay, well let’s talk about ELIZABETH and Artie. Now, (leans forward) how resentful were you? (jerks thumb backwards, over his shoulder) ELIZABETH slept with him, and not with you. (points at KENDALL)
KENDALL: Well. He’s married, I’m not. So yeah, maybe I’m a little resentful.
(SWEETS nods)
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, ANGELA’s office. The computer screen is displaying a photo of the band-aid. ANGELA is puzzling over it, and HODGINS walks in.)
HODGINS: Band-aid? (picks up a book off of the coffee table and sits down on the couch)
ANGELA: Oh, yeah, thanks. I was totally flummoxed. So the clean part here must be where it overlapped, and the darker part must be where it came in contact with the skin.
HODGINS: I’m not an expert, (flips through book) but I’m pretty sure even you can’t get a DNA result from a digital photograph.
ANGELA: No, but, what about a finger size?
HODGINS: Oh. Wow. (shuts book and puts it back on table before standing and walking toward ANGELA) Right, that’s kinda brilliant.
ANGELA: Eighty-two millimeters in circumference.
HODGINS: All right, well, (picks up a measuring tape from desk and loops it around his finger) mine’s sixty-two, so it’s a pretty big guy.
ANGELA: Or overweight.
HODGINS: Look at the perforations. (points at screen) Vertical stretching along the pad.
ANGELA: I see it, but I have no idea what it means. (laughs)
HODGINS: It was locked, in a (hooks finger) bent position.
ANGELA: Oh, that would explain the creases. (moves mouse and clicks) So if I highlight the parts where the adhesive wore off, it was bent more than ninety degrees. I really love (straightens and faces HODGINS, then seems to catch herself) working, with you.
HODGINS: Me too. We’re really good together. At these things.
ANGELA: Yeah.
(HODGINS walks away, then stops before doorway and turns back to ANGELA.)
HODGINS: Gotta ask you something, ANGELA.
ANGELA: Yeah, I—I got that from the fast double back.
HODGINS: This thing with ROXIE…
ANGELA: It’s real, yeah.
HODGINS: No, I get that. I see that. Is that what got between us?
ANGELA: I’d love to say yes to that, because I think it would make you feel better.
HODGINS: But you can fall in love with a man.
ANGELA: I’m sorry, but, yes. (nods)
(HODGINS nods back with a small smile, then leaves the office.)
BRENNAN: (through computer) Ang?
(ANGELA turns back to computer)
ANGELA: Sweetie. God. (rubs a hand over her forehead, then laughs) Totally forgot you were there. I guess you heard everything, huh?
BRENNAN: (through computer) Yes, it was fascinating.
ANGELA: Well, what do you think?
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station.)
BRENNAN: Well, the only joint that will bend over ninety degrees is between the proximal and intermediate phalanges.
ANGELA: (through laptop) Right. Finger stuff.
BRENNAN: We’re looking for a large person, probably male, with inflammatory flexor tenosynovitis.
ANGELA: (through laptop) That’s great, sweetie, but what about the rest of the conversation?
BRENNAN: Oh, I’m sorry, Ang, I wasn’t paying attention. I need to go find a passenger with trigger finger.
ANGELA: (through laptop) Thanks for the talk.
(BRENNAN walks away from the laptop.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach class. The lights blink on, and BRENNAN’s voice comes over the speakers as she speaks into the phone)
BRENNAN: Excuse me, if I could have your attention, please. My name is Dr. Temperance BRENNAN.
NICK DEVITO: The writer?
BRENNAN: Yes. What we need to do now is find a passenger with a laceration locked proximal interphalangeal joint, so if everyone can look at their neighbor’s proximal interpha—
(BOOTH takes phone)
BOOTH: I tell you what, who would like a free signed copy of Dr. BRENNAN’s new book? Raise your hands. Look at that, huh?
BRENNAN: Ah, (lightly hits him on his arm) I see what you’re doing.
BOOTH: All right, so keep your hands up nice and high so Dr. BRENNAN can count the number of books we need. Hey, does anyone have a, a question for Dr. BRENNAN?
CHARLOTTE: Are you working on anything right now, Dr. BRENNAN?
BRENNAN: Yes. Keep your hands up.
NADINE: What is that delicious smell?
BRENNAN: Roast pork.
BOOTH: Oh, no, that delicious smell is the difference between first class and coach. How’re we doing there, Bones?
BRENNAN: (grabs DEVITO’s hand) BOOTH?
BOOTH: (in background) Hold that.
BRENNAN: Over here.
DEVITO: Uh. Hi.
BRENNAN: Hi. BOOTH?
BOOTH: (walks over quickly) Yeah. (BRENNAN shows him DEVITO’s hand.) Uh, what’s your name?
DEVITO: Uh, just sign it to Awesome NICK DEVITO. Uh, what is the big deal? I just got a little trigger finger. I—I injured my tendon.
BOOTH: You like shooting a lot?
DEVITO: Yeah, I love shooting. Doesn’t mean I’m not a reader.
BOOTH: Yeah, I tell you what, why don’t you come with us, come on. (gestures for DEVITO to stand)
(DEVITO, BOOTH and BRENNAN start to walk out of coach.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. DEVITO is being questioned by BOOTH and BRENNAN.)
DEVITO: I don’t know anybody named ELIZABETH JONES, no.
(Satellite phone beeps. BOOTH answers.)
BOOTH: Hey, SWEETS.
(Cut to: FBI conference room. SWEETS is standing and has a phone to his ear, and KENDALL is sitting at the table.)
BOOTH: (through phone) Are you still with ELIZABETH JONES’s editor?
SWEETS: Yes, and I have—
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
BOOTH: (interrupts) All right, ask him if he knows someone by the name of NICK DEVITO.
DEVITO: Is this like a question, to get my free book?
BRENNAN: Where’s your band-aid?
(Cut to: FBI conference room)
SWEETS: (leans down across table) Do you know NICK DEVITO?
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
DEVITO: Must have come off while I was asleep. I twitch. I’m (shakes head) twitchy.
(Cut to: FBI conference room)
KENDALL: I had lunch once with Danny Devito.
SWEETS: He says no. (straightens) I have information.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
SWEETS: (through phone) ELIZABETH JONES was having an affair with a man known only as “Artie”.
(Cut to: FBI conference room)
SWEETS: The relationship’s been going on for over a year, but it went bad in the last month or so.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
SWEETS: (through phone) He’s married. His wife is sick, and his kid is a pain in the ass.
BOOTH: (looks through curtain into first class and looks at BILBREY) You know what, SWEETS, you are the man of the hour. I owe you a beer and a rye chaser, my friend.
(Cut to: FBI conference room)
SWEETS: …sounds like it would make me sick.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
BOOTH: (hangs up; to DEVITO) You can go back to your seat.
BRENNAN: Why?
(DEVITO walks between BOOTH and BRENNAN and back into coach.)
BOOTH: Well, we have a much better suspect.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN look through curtain at BILBREY.)
(Cut to: Airplane interior. Close-up shot of the flight progress map on a television screen in first class. BILBREY walks over to ELI and pulls his blanket up over his body. BOOTH walks up to BILBREY.)
BOOTH: I think you know why I’m here.
BILBREY: Look, I’m sorry about my son. He’s a teenager. His mother’s very ill.
BOOTH: It’s not about your son, Artie. It’s about ELIZABETH JONES.
(BILBREY looks over at ANN, then jerks his head forward and walks toward the front of the plane. BOOTH follows.)
BILBREY: My wife doesn’t know about EJ. I would like to keep it that way.
BOOTH: Did ELIZABETH JONES ask you to leave your wife?
BILBREY: From the very beginning, I told ELIZABETH that would never happen. You see the shape that ANN’s in? My first priority is to be a good husband and a good father.
BOOTH: By dragging a dying woman to China?
BILBREY: No, to stand on the Great Wall of China has been ANN’s dream since she was a little girl. Our last chance to do something amazing as a family together.
BOOTH: So ELIZABETH JONES followed you?
BILBREY: Obviously.
BOOTH: Huh. And you killed her.
BILBREY: Of course not.
(An attendant says “excuse me” and walks between BOOTH and BILBREY.)
BILBREY: I am a lawyer.
BOOTH: Hm. Your wife didn’t know about her?
BILBREY: She knows that there was someone.
BOOTH: Did you talk to ELIZABETH?
BILBREY: Yes, I begged her to leave us alone. ANN was asleep. As I said, Agent BOOTH, I’m an attorney. You have no evidence and very little time before we land in Shanghai. If you want to find out who killed EJ, I suggest you not waste any more time on me. (walks away)
(BOOTH sighs.)
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, ANGELA’s office. ANGELA, HODGINS and CAROLINE are present and communicating with BOOTH and BRENNAN via the internet.)
ANGELA: I enhanced the photographs of the sternum. Light was reflected off of this area here. (points to picture on screen) Skin wouldn’t do that. There were tiny metal shards imbedded in the bone.
HODGINS: And silicon melted into it as well.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendants quarters. BOOTH is walking in.)
BOOTH: Fake boobs? How does that help?
BRENNAN: Silicon, not silicone.
HODGINS: (through laptop) It was a chip of some kind, a SIM card from a phone, a memory chip from a camera, but we need to see it to make a positive ID.
CAROLINE: (walks closer to ANGELA’s computer) How did it go with BILBREY?
BOOTH: Ah, he’s an attorney, he’s not saying much of anything.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, ANGELA’s office)
CAROLINE: And the gun nut, DEVITO?
BRENNAN: (through computer) Most likely, his band-aid was stuck to the wheel of a food cart.
CAROLINE: Find me the smoking gun, cherie, or that killer disappears into a billion people when you land.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
BRENNAN: One point two nine billion, approximately. Are you pressuring us?
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, ANGELA’s office)
CAROLINE: Have a lovely flight. (walks away)
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station)
BLAKE: (walks up to BOOTH and BRENNAN) I was just contacted by Shanghai International. They’ve arrested a man named FELIX CLOSSEN, a Dutch national who works for the airline. He was passing stolen credit card numbers.
BOOTH: That’s fascinating, but we’re more interested in solving a murder investigation right now.
BLAKE: All the credit card numbers were from passengers on this plane. And CLOSSEN is our flight attendant’s boyfriend.
BRENNAN: MING.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, kitchen galley. MING is being questioned by BRENNAN and BOOTH.)
BRENNAN: Your call to CLOSSEN was made within minutes of the victim being placed in the oven.
BOOTH: Minutes.
MING: I got the credit card numbers off the computer, and called them in to my boyfriend.
BRENNAN: And ELIZABETH JONES caught you?
MING: Yes. I mean, no.
BOOTH: Well, which one is it?
MING: I didn’t know who it was. I heard them coming and figured it was KATE, so I hid in the aeronautics compartment.
BOOTH: Well who was with ELIZABETH?
MING: I couldn’t hear because of the engine noise in the compartment. All I could see was their feet.
BRENNAN: Male or female? Uh, what kind of shoes?
MING: They were wearing slippers, the ones we give out in first class. They’re all the same. They walked by me and I ran upstairs. I didn’t kill anyone.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, attendant station. BOOTH and BRENNAN are walking up the stairs.)
BRENNAN: Whoever killed her has to have traces of blood on their slippers. That could cause the gun to smoke for CAROLINE.
BOOTH: No, Bones, you’re going to need an ALS light. Not even those dotty old mystery buffs carry that in their giant purses.
BRENNAN; We can make one.
BOOTH: How’re you going to make one?
BLAKE: (approaches from behind) Hope you can do it fast. We’re going to be landing very soon.
BOOTH: Oh, no, no, no. You’re not landing this plane until I tell you you land this plane, okay? Remember, you’re still a suspect.
BLAKE: It’s not about me or you. We’re going to run out of fuel in twenty minutes.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN exchange looks.)
(Cut to: Airplane exterior.)
BRENNAN: Okay, BOOTH? We need the blue lamp out of the overhead projector.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, coach. BOOTH is removing the blue lamp from the projector.)
BRENNAN: (to DEVITO) Do you, by any chance, have any yellow-tinted shooting glasses?
DEVITO: Sure, (reaches under seat) what do you need? Daylight, artificial light, or, uh, moonlight? (pulls out case and opens it)
BRENNAN: Let’s see. (picks up a pair) These will do. (puts on the glasses) Thanks!
CHARLOTTE: This is brilliant. They’re making an ALS emitter.
DEVITO: What’s that for?
NADINE: To find blood!
BOOTH: Ready?
BRENNAN: Got ‘em.
BOOTH: (to MCNUTT) Hit the lights. (The lights dim.) Oh.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN enter first class, shining the blue lamp in front of them.)
BOOTH: Easy, Bones. You see anything?
BRENNAN: No…no…nothing.
(BOOTH shines the light at BILBREY’s feet.)
BOOTH: How ‘bout over here? Right there.
BRENNAN: Mm-mm, nothing.
BOOTH: (groan) Oh, geez.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN move away from BILBREY. BRENNAN looks at the ground in front of ELI.)
BRENNAN: Booth.
BOOTH: Yeah?
BRENNAN: Over there.
BOOTH: You got something?
(BOOTH shines the blue lamp on ELI’s slippers, and spots appear.)
BRENNAN: Yes, there.
BOOTH: You’re sure?
BRENNAN: Yes, BOOTH.
BOOTH: (yanks blanket away from ELI, where it was covering his face; to MCNUTT) Turn the lights on.
BILBREY: (standing) What is going on, please?
BRENNAN: Your son killed ELIZABETH JONES.
BOOTH: (to MCNUTT) Okay, how long ‘til we land?
MCNUTT: Uh, we’re on our final descent.
BILBREY: ELI, that’s impossible.
BOOTH: Oh, why, you can’t think of a motive like maybe, he loves his mother? Huh? He wants to keep his family together? (lifts phone to his ear) You probably just think he’s some dumb-ass kid.
CAROLINE: (through phone) I beg your pardon?
BOOTH: Hey, I’m, lis-listen, CAROLINE, I’m ready to make an arrest.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAROLINE: You’re more than sure, right, cherie? You’re damn sure?
BOOTH: (through phone) Well, it’s circumstantial…
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BOOTH: …but it’s, uh, compelling. So do you have a warrant to sign?
CAROLINE: (through phone) Yes.
BOOTH: Well sign it so I can make the arrest.
BILBREY: Just a minute, please.
CAROLINE: (through phone) That’s the lawyer, right?
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAROLINE: You can always tell a damn lawyer.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BILBREY: I represent my son, who is also minor…
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
BILBREY: …incidentally.
CAROLINE: Minor?
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BRENNAN: A minor murderer!
MCNUTT: (through speakers) Ladies and gentlemen, we are making our final descent into Shanghai International Airport. Please return your seats to their upright position and turn off all…
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
MCNUTT: (through phone) …electronic devices.
CAM: BOOTH, you’re cutting it pretty close, there.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BOOTH: Yeah, I know.
ELI: What’s going on?
BRENNAN: We know you killed ELIZABETH JONES.
BOOTH: Probably why you wanted to get so drunk, huh, ELI?
BILBREY: Don’t say a word, ELI, not a word. (to BOOTH) You’re making this arrest on the strength of blood stains…
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
BILBREY: …that could belong to anyone in first class.
CAROLINE: BOOTH.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BOOTH: Okay, motive. The father was cheating on the dying wife with the victim.
ANN: Arthur?
BOOTH: (to BILBREY) You thought the family was safe by getting away from the woman…
(cut to: Airplane exterior. Airplane is approaching runway.)
BRENNAN: BOOTH…
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BRENNAN: We’re really close to the ground.
BOOTH: She shows up on the plane, in first class.
BILBREY: Not a word, ELI.
(Cut to: Airplane exterior. Airplane is closer to the runway.)
BRENNAN: BOOTH, I can see people.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BRENNAN: We have less than thirty seconds.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAROLINE: BOOTH!
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BOOTH: CAROLINE, you gotta trust me on this.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAROLINE: Make the case, Agent BOOTH.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
CAROLINE: (through phone) Something more than motive.
(BRENNAN grabs a case away from ELI)
BOOTH: Bones…
BRENNAN: BOOTH?
BOOTH: Yeah.
BRENNAN: If this missing video game turns out to be the computer chip imbedded in the victim’s sternum…
(BOOTH grabs the video game away from ELI and looks into card slot, which is empty)
BOOTH: Where’d you lose the cartridge, ELI? (ELI is silent.) We got forensic corroboration.
(Cut to: Airplane exterior. Airplane is feet away from touching down on the runway.)
BILBREY: “If”, she said…
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
BILBREY: …”if”!
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAM: Just sign it.
(Cut to: Airplane exterior. Airplane is feet away from touching down on the runway.)
BOOTH: (through phone) The moment this plane touches down, I lose jurisdiction.
(Cut to: The Medico-Legal Lab, CAM’s office)
CAROLINE: This better be a good—
CAM: (interrupts) Sign the warrant. (CAROLINE glares.) Please.
(Cut to: Airplane interior, first class)
CAROLINE: (through phone) Okay, make the arrest.
BOOTH: (lowers phone; speaks quickly) ELI BILBREY, I am placing you under arrest for the murder of ELIZABETH JONES, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law because this is the United States of America!
(Cut to: Airplane exterior; airplane touches down on runway. Airplane interior, first class. BOOTH and BRENNAN stumble as the plane touches down. The airplane is filled with applause.)
BRENNAN: (waving) Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
BOOTH: Bones. The applause is for the landing.
BRENNAN: Oh, yes. I always wonder why people do that.
(Cut to: A bar. ANGELA is carrying two drinks to a table where ROXIE is sitting. They “clink” their glasses together.)
ROXIE: Did you catch the murderer?
ANGELA: Yeah.
ROXIE: That’s great. (ANGELA sighs) It’s not great?
ANGELA: He was sixteen.
ROXIE: Oh.
ANGELA: Dying mom, cheating father. He just wanted to make it stop.
ROXIE: I’m sorry. That counts as a crappy day. (small laugh) You should probably just go home and draw a bath.
ANGELA: I want you to come with me and stay.
ROXIE: Of course I’ll stay.
ANGELA: (smiles and sighs) I mean, I-I want you to, move in with me.
ROXIE: This isn’t just because you’ve had a bad day, right? Because…
ANGELA: No. It isn’t.
ROXIE: You’ve never done that before, asked someone to move in with you.
ANGELA: No. (shakes head)
ROXIE: You’ve lived with people at their place.
ANGELA: (laughs) With my bag packed by the front door, yeah. (looks hopefully at ROXIE, then smiles) Why aren’t you saying anything? (ROXIE is quiet) Right. Because you’re gonna say “no”.
ROXIE: Yeah, I am. I’m saying “no, thanks”.
ANGELA: Why?
ROXIE: It’s too soon. You aren’t ready. I’m not ready. Let’s just see how things unfold, okay?
ANGELA: (laughs) Okay.
ROXIE: What?
ANGELA: I’m always the one to say that.
(Cut to: Airplane exterior, in hangar. Airplane interior, first class. BOOTH walks into first class holding a bottle of champagne and two glasses, already full.)
BOOTH: Look what I found, huh? There’s that smile. (hands a glass to BRENNAN)
BRENNAN: Thank you.
BOOTH: Mm-hmm.
BRENNAN: We don’t even get to get off the plane?
BOOTH: Nope, they’re refueling, and finding us another pilot, and (makes a swoosh noise, then “clinks” his glass against BRENNAN’s) go back home.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN take a drink. BRENNAN looks back into coach, where ELI is sitting and is handcuffed to his seat.)
BRENNAN: What about his parents?
BOOTH: They gotta fly back on their own dime. ELI is in federal custody now.
(BRENNAN nods, then half-smiles. BOOTH looks at her closely.)
BOOTH: You want to get off the plane, to see those old Chinese bones. I’m sorry.
BRENNAN: It’s not your fault.
BOOTH: Yeah, it is, because I’m the one that dragged you out of pure science and pulled you into murder solving.
BRENNAN: That’s not how I remember it.
BOOTH: Really.
BRENNAN: Yes. As I recall, I had to force you to take me into the field.
BOOTH: (smiles) Really.
BRENNAN: Yes. You didn’t want to, remember? This is all my fault.
(BOOTH and BRENNAN smile at each other. ELI sighs.)
ELI: Hey, are you two gonna make out?
BOOTH: Hey, quiet. You lost your right to talk.
BRENNAN: Why do people always think we’re going to make out?
BOOTH: I say we let him sit back there the entire trip back, by himself.
BRENNAN: He did kill someone. And he ruined my dig. Plus, you know he’s gonna try to drink all the champagne.
BOOTH: We’re going to need some for later. To us. (holds up glass and “clinks” it against BRENNAN’s. They each take a drink, then recline their seats, making content noises. BOOTH’s only reclines halfway.) Hey, why does yours go all the way back and mine doesn’t go all the way back?
BRENNAN: Oh, it’s just how mine is.
BOOTH: This is first class. They’re supposed to go all the way back.
BRENNAN: Maybe it’s because you’re supposed to be in coach.
(Scene fades out)
END
